I have often wondered long and hard about the nature, nurture argument! Having had identical twins, it is sometimes hard to get your head around not only the fact that your TWO children should have only been one, but also how they can differ so drastically when they were essentially the same egg.
The more the girls grow up, the more I believe the nature argument wins. I believe that nature provides the personalities of a foetus way before a parent can nurture them. For example, Monkey was the restless one in the womb; the consultant noted on a few occasions, that she was kicking her sister while I was having my scans.
Today she is still the restless one, she will not sit still and instead insists on leaping off the furniture, sitting on the coffee table and even sits on her head upside down to watch the TV. She has always needed attention ever since she was a baby; she cried and wanted picking up every five minutes.
Mookin on the other hand has a much more placid, independent personality. She will sit still for ages doing colouring, jigsaws and watching a film alone. She doesn’t need attention and prefers to play on her own sometimes, much to her sisters frustration… She was also a content little baby!
However, there are other things too that are so completely different between them. Mookin potty trained in 5 days and has only had one accident since, she was distraught when it happened and has been dry at night for a year too. Monkey still has accidents to this day and is happy to sit in it without a care in the world, plus her pull ups are still wet every morning!
BUT, Monkey has always held her pen properly from the word go, and is quite studious, she is dying to learn letters, numbers and reading. Mookin still holds her pen in her fist no matter how often I put her right, she is head strong and stubborn. They fight like cat and dog, but then they have such different personalities that it isn’t a wonder that they do so.
Mookin will be happily playing and Monkey will wade in all guns blazing, expecting her sister to play with her when Mookin just wants to be alone! Before I had the girls, I had this silly preconception that they would adore each other, that they would be inseparable! However, in reality, they are just like any other siblings; they fight, argue and love each other all at the same time.
I find them fascinating and frustrating, but I do still wonder what that one little girl would have been like if my pesky egg hadn’t of split… Would she have had the calm independency of Mookin or the hyperactive traits of Monkey? I guess I will never know!